Pre-departure homesickness

Approximately in 4 days and 9hours, I will be leaving this house to the airport. It feels like all my daydreams are finally becoming a reality. Although I'm super excited about it and know that this is one of the best decisions I've made, I still feel sad that I'm leaving my hometown that I've lived my entire life and parting with my mum. This is apparently called "pre-departure homesickness."

Going to the UK isn't a totally new experience for me. I mean, I've already been to Exeter once and I have relatives nearby. I will also be able to see my parents regularly via Skype. I all know this in my head. But my heart still doesn't like parting. I cried yesterday on my own but try to keep a smile when I'm with mum and when we had a farewell party with my relatives from Tokyo. (It was just an excuse to get together but whatever. We got money.)

I experienced "regular" homesickness when I stayed in the UK for 5 months when I was 10 years old. My parents were with me then so I was missing the comfort of my hometown. I cried for a week that time. This time I will miss the comfort of my hometown AND my mum. (not my dad because he hasn't been living here for 3 years because of his work.)

I learned that cure for pre-departure homesickness is to distract yourself from thinking about how sad you will feel when you get on the bus to the airport.

I find myself thinking about how I will cry when getting on the bus when I'm trying to sleep. In the daytime, when I start to feel sad, I do my translation work. My part time job at the supermarket is helping me to be distracted. I watch Shane Dawson videos on YouTube which also keeps me distracted.

Distraction and thinking about what will happen after the tears makes me feel a little bit better. Thanks to Facebook, I've already made friends with a Vietnamese girl and a Georgian boy who will both be studying at INTO University of Exeter. But they will be studying in the Business course. (I'm in the science course.) Anyway, what I want to say is that I have a bright future in front of me. All I have to overcome is parting and the world is my oyster. ...I still don't understand that expression. :P

Why do I get the impression that...

...American health drinks are really unhealthy?? It seems that the more they try to make healthy new products, the less natural it gets. I mean, who wants to drink coconut water that tastes like chocolate??? That's fucking gross.
Just drink whole milk and you'll be fine.

One thing I noticed while translating...

...is there are lots of weird products in the US.

Sudden GUSH of translating job!!!!!

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Happy but it's gonna be tough. I'm going to work at the supermarket until the day before I leave here. I can't be messing around! Gotta start translating ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOO HOOOOO

Movin on

I had dinner with Tsuzuki-san who use to be my class mate. She isn't going to university but is studying in a cram school for the next entrance exam.
We talked about who's in which university and what her class mate at the cram school ask her advice for. I told her how working at Aeon has been an amazing experience and how everything I learned in high school won't compare with what I've learned there. The conversation about who went were was very trivial to me. I really don't care. I didn't even remember half of who she was talking about. Her friend asking what she should text the person she has a crush on? WhatEVER! Doesn't she have something else to worry about?
Waiting an extra year to enter university is just waste of time in my opinion. I'm not even in England and I'm already glad that I'm going. I can't imagine going to a Japanese university. Honestly.

Carbon Offset=Hypocrite

My supermarket is proud that they are eco-friendly because they offset CO2. Every time I see ads about it, I always think "why is this a good thing? Why can you be proud of doing such a thing?" Buying the right to emit CO2 from other countries? (Aeon specifically say that's what they do.) That hypocritical and self centered, if you ask me. Just sayin.

Note Whore

There's a guy who can't really do much although he's been working at the supermarket longer than me.
This morning, we had a situation where we had to open the drawer of the cash register. He(The Loser) didn't know how to open it. There is a way to open it but it's a complicated process (kinda). It has to be complicated enough so that the customers can't open it and take the money.
I figured that I could open it the way when I end the machine at the end of the day.
I did it. It worked.
The Loser asked me how I did it. I said "The way we close the machine. You do know how to close the machine, right?" He said, "I've done it twice. I haven't really taken any notes though."
I took that reply as "I don't really know how to do it" because it's impossible (for me anyway) to close the machine without looking at the notes. So I decided to tell him how to do it. Although, I know it's not going to be really helpful if we actually did it. Not just tell him.
I explained it to him anyway. I checked from time to time if he was writing down what I was saying. He was trying to copy off my notes! So I hid it with my hand thinking "you ain't copying mine!!! What good will that do? Jeeeesus!"
He didn't take any notes after I hid my notes.
It seemed to me that all he wanted to do from the beginning was copy mine. I don't even think he wanted to hear my explanation either.

Receipt kaos

I've been working with a lady who works during the gift season for a while. She knows pretty much everything there is to know about anything related to gifts.
Not that I don't know anything, though. She told me yesterday that I shouldn't stick the receipt that comes out after I press the "receipt" button.
I was told by the manager to press the "saitoroku" button before scanning the items if the customer pays by cash or cash cards. By doing so, two receipts come out; one for the customer, one for us to stick on the order sheet. If I forget to press it (which I do often), I was told to either write down the receipt number on the order or press the "receipt" button. If you press "receipt," out comes three receipts. One for the customer, one for the order sheet, one for the "receipt sheet". The receipt sheet is usually for when the customer pays by credit card because we have to press "receipt" instead of "saitoroku".
Anyway, the point is, I was doing the way the manager told me to. I explained that to her but she was still not satisfied. There was nothing more I could do. She has to deal with it.

And btw, she has bad breath.

Matthew Lush

Random hot guys end up as my wallpaper.

Stats

The National suicide rate is 3 per 100,000 People. The Transgender Transsexual suicide rate is 31% of our group. Over 50% of Transsexuals will have had at least one suicide attempt by their 20th birthday. Even more self harm themselves daily either by cutting or self mutilation.
(http://www.lauras-playground.com/transsexual_transgender_suicide_memorial.htm)

•36.5 % of GLB youth grades 9-12 have attempted suicide. 20.5% of those attempts resulting in medical care
•Gay and lesbian youth are 2 to 3 times more likely to attempt suicide than heterosexual young people.
•As many as 1 in 3 gay and lesbian youth have attempted suicide.
•In a 1998 health survey conducted by Youth Pride, Inc. aimed at LGBTQQ youth, 58% of respondents reported that they had felt suicidal as teenagers.
•33.2% of transgender youth have attempted suicide.
•In a survey of 403 transgender people, 78% reported having been verbally harassed and 48% reported having been victims of assault, including assault with a weapon, sexual assault or rape.
(http://www.youthprideri.org/Resources/Statistics/tabid/227/Default.aspx)


After my mum found out about the statistics, she asked me if I ever thought about suicide.
I found that question hilarious.

My dad told me I had a "low tolerance for pain."
He doesn't know I was a self harmer.

My parents are really amusing.

Gay Bashing

I was really glad to watch this video. It seems that, although there is a regional difference, the attitude towards gay families is moving for the positive. I didn't expect that the experiment was done in Texas. My image of Texas was a conservative place where nobody liked gay people! I was completely mistaken!! And I was mistaken that New Yorkers would speak out for justice. :(

Bats Sing Mice Giggle Book Review

Using the dictionary a million times, I finally finished reading this book that was given to me from my dad. I wasn't interested when he gave it to me. I mean, who cares if bats sing and mice giggle? Let them sing and giggle. But I needed an English book to prepare for my awesome time in the UK.

This book turned out to be a rather good read. It "upended (<-one of the words I learned from this book)" my perception of the animal kingdom. Bats sing mice giggle is filled with secrets of what animals do to feed, reproduce and entertain themselves. It's not like knowing all this would make a difference in my life but still, it's interesting to know various animals use different means to communicate and measure distances etc. And it's also interesting to know there actually are scientists who do research about all this!
As humans, we think we have advanced technology than any other animal but now that I've read this book, I think animals are thinking the same thing about us!

For instance, it's widely known that bats use ultrasonic waves to locate where the prey is. What I didn't know was how accurate this technology is. The same can be said for the migratory birds/animals. They use the magnetic fields of the earth. Vibration, electric fields, and sound are also used to communicate, locate and as a result, survive.
Animals taste their food just like we do. Some species taste before putting the food in their mouth!
Geese fly in a formation that is energy efficient.
Some males deceive rival males in a very sneaky way to get females.

Those are some of the amazing things that this book has taught me.

I recommend this book because:
it is simply interesting
and there were many words that I didn't know and helped build my vocabulary.


A good experience creates more "loving" and "pleasurable" biochemicals as well as good memories of the person with whom we shared such an experience.

My favorite Tanka

I didn't really pay much attention to Tanka classes but there has been one that I loved since I read it on a textbook.

Omoitsutsu Nurebaya Hitonometsuran

Yumetoshiriseba Samezaramashio

By Onono Komachi

My translation would go like this:
I was with you in my dream. Was it because I fell asleep thinking of you?
I wouldｎ’t have woken up if I knew it was a dream.

The sound of each letter in the tanka flows smoothly and the feeling as a whole is very touching. And every time I have a dream about someone special (which is rare), I recall this tanka. I'm like "damn, I wish I could dream that dream again!" But all I can do is think about that dream all day!

The author, Onono Komachi is a very famous poet of the Heian era (9th century). She was chosen by Kino Tsurayuki as one of the "six poets (rokkasen)." Despite her poems being so famous, little is known about Komachi. Even the picture below was drawn after her death.

28 more days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Until I leave this country!!! Super excited!!!
I got my work plan today and I have another 76 hours of work. Which is exciting as well!! (Apart from the fact that I work with the slowest loser ever.) I GET MONEY.

btw guess how much I've saved up?

670,795yen!!! (It's not exactly that... That includes my next month's salary.) That should cover the $8,000 for my top surgery and still leave 186 pounds for hormones. (I love it when a dollar is 80 yen. Currency rate ftw!)

Albinism

There's been a costumer I've seen a couple of times at the supermarket. The first time I saw him was from behind and I thought it was an older man with his granddaughter or something. His hair reminded me of my grandad because it was snow white. But when I saw his face, he wasn't an elderly at all! Probably in his 20s or something. Also his face was extremely pale. I knew it was some kind of medical condition but I couldn't recall the name of it.

Coincidentally, I came across a video about it. Albinism. People who don't have some kind of pigment. At least, that's my understanding. The first few minutes of watching the video, I was like "I think silver blonds look super cool. What's their problem, there's loads of white people with silver blond hair. I saw them in Helsinki airport."
I was greatly mistaken. Albinism isn't only among Caucasians but any races and animals. And they have to apply sunscreen all the time and most people have eye problems. I was amazed when I found out about the African American guy with albinism. No wonder he feels like an outsider. It's like, he's black and white at the same time.
And the eye-twitching thing must be really hard too. The vision would be blurred and I imagine they can't focus on what they want to look at. It must be really annoying and distracting.

I read on Wikipedia (like I always do) that people with albinism are killed in Africa because they are the devil or something. And they face lots of obstacles and uncomfortable things...

....But a part of me still thinks it looks cool. I can't help it. So angel-like.

You can watch the documentary about albinism here.