Tuesday 13 July 2010

I DIDN'T SEND THE NAME CHANGING THING YESTERDAY.

THE MORE I THOUGHT ABOUT IT, THE MORE I BECAME STRESSED AND DEPRESSED.

WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?

FUCK GENDER.

I WISH I COULD JUST DISAPPEAR...

LINKIN PARK'S SONG "GIVEN UP" PERFECTLY DESCRIBES THIS EMOTION.


I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TAKE
THOUGHT I WAS FOCUSED BUT I'M SCARED
I'M NOT PREPARED

I'M MY OWN WORST ENEMY

I'VE GIVEN UP
I'M SICK OF FEELING
IS THERE NOTHING YOU CAN SAY
TAKE THIS ALL AWAY
I'M SUFFOCATING
TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME

PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY

4 comments:

  1. Don't give up! You are a strong, amazing person. And maybe you are going through this to help spread love, acceptance, and peace in our world. We need more people like you!

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  2. Come on! Get some perspective! There are people in far worse situations. I know it is frustrating but things are really going to take off for you once you finish this last year of your "prison sentence" and breathe the sweet perfume of freedom. Try to remember that! While you are having a good time in England, I am still going to be here in Nippon dealing with these boneheads until I finally keel over from overwork and stress.
    You also have a job to do which you are probably not aware of. Have you thought about all the people who are just like yourself but feel like they are alone? By writing this blog and by being a brave example to others, you may inspire many others to find a way forward. Who will help these young people in Japan? Nobody! Who will be a role model for them? Nobody??? Really? That's your job, buddy! You need to find a way forward and then help others do the same.

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  3. Thanks...
    I get depressed when I have to think about what I really need. I have to hold on to myself.
    I hope I can be able to help someone somehow.

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  4. Excellent advice Sensei!

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